Rev. Criss Ittermann is a quadruple-threat: Interfaith minister, shamanic practioner, Reiki master and life coach. Here, she coaches you out of singleton “panic mode”.
Together we can transform it into the holiday of sacred and unconditional love. It is possible to take an over-commoditized holiday and turn it into a sacred celebration of the spiritual side of love.
Rather than turning the day’s passion inwards to only the very closest people in our lives — or worse, making it into a pity party for the single person without a date — why not go to great lengths to expand the circle of those you love, express love to, and experience a divine connection with?
From panicked, to peaceful, to passionate
Often we get caught up in our daily activities, steeped in worry and fending off being overwhelmed, while juggling our many hats and roles. I call this state of being “panic mode”. When we’re in this state, it’s not really possible to connect deeply with other people. It narrows our focus, and makes us very self-centered, as we are focused on our own “survival” in the hustle and bustle of every day life.
No celebration of Valentine’s Day should be lived in panic mode. If you want to give gifts, gather them well in advance and plan the day with a great deal of forethought. In case you’re unable to plan ahead, I’ll give you some ideas for a very simple, romantic and sensual celebration. No partner required.
If you are in a panic over the lack of a mate for Valentine’s Day, take seriously the “Embody the Divine” exercise and work it thoroughly. When you are panicked you may seem desperate, angry, or worried. Being without a partner is not an emergency, and if you act like it is, you will drive everyone away.
‘Embody the Divine’
Find the things you love to do, and do them with other people you love. There is nothing more attractive than passion. When you stop panicking and stop looking, love finds you. Let the “search” go, take a moment for peace, and then do what you love.
When we take the time to get back into the present moment, we can reorient ourselves so that we can access our feelings again. From a place of peace, it’s possible to do some very simple, focused exercises to find passion. When we are nurtured in passionate energy, we are a hair’s breadth from the Divine.
Our life is a sacred gift. Once we step out of our ego, by simply accepting things the way they are without any whining, we can find the connection we have to the gift of life that gives us awareness. For those of us who cannot recognize the connection or have difficulty getting our ego out of the way, try to exercise your gratitude muscles.
In simple deference to the holiday-at-hand, let’s first focus on our gratitude for those we love.
“For every person you love, there are dozens more who were a shaping influence on them”
Next, become expansive on the topic: for every person you love, there are dozens or even hundreds of people who were a shaping influence, and helped them become the person you are loving. Send these people love, because they have contributed to the lives of those you love.
Next be grateful for your food, and by extension the hundreds or thousands of people who helped provide you with food, from the raising of animals or growing of crops, to the cashier who rang your purchase up, and the attendant who pumped gas into your car so you could get the food to your table. As you continue to find excuses to be grateful in ever-widening circles, you will find that we are all connected.
Find any way possible to become aware of our interconnectedness and our shared spiritual and essential energy.
Oxygen, the water molecules we breathe and drink, nutrients, and the sun that nurtures all of us have been shared by every human over and over again. We all depend on a friendly sun buffered by a protective atmosphere, six inches of topsoil and the fact that it rains in order to live. We all breathe, feel, dream, hurt and cry. And we all have the capacity to love and recognize that we are all connected.
Many people believe that something endures when our body has ceased to breathe, and many of those people believe that we are all connected in spirit as well as by species, by food, by molecules and by planet.
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